I feel very compelled today to reveal something which is very private and personal, however, it is such a huge part of my journey that I can no longer keep it hidden. I have been getting many “intuitive” messages that are telling me to share it with my “ohana” (family) here. So, here goes…(disclaimer: everything stated here is only from my perspective which was probably very distorted. I am not making any claims, I am only speaking my truth as it is for me).
FATSO, FATSO
Every since I was 8 years old, I have been trying to lose weight. I was teased at school each day “fatso, fatso”. It hurt like crazy! 😥 When we would be in PE at school, we would all line up, and the captains of each team would verbally fight with each other because no one wanted me on their team. I was too slow, and too fat. So, I started to watch what I ate, and I tried to cut calories. I began an obsessive study of food, fat, and calories! I can tell you exactly how much fat and calories are in everything! I read all the books and the magazines. I bought every diet pill and miracle cure. I tried every grapefruit diet, protein, mushrooms, yogurt, rice cakes, bars, you name it, I tried it!! Then I started to exercise, because if you exercise you burn calories! When I was a senior in high school, I wanted to be thin for the pictures, so I started to starve myself. I lost so much weight that my period stopped and the doctor had to give me medication to start it again.
Then when I was a freshman in college, I ballooned to almost 200lbs. I had gained about 80 lbs in 6 months! 🙁 During the 60’s & 70’s (yes I’m that old), no one understood anorexia and bulimia. It didn’t make sense to people that someone could be addicted to food, just like cocaine or alcohol. It wasn’t until 1983, when Karen Carpenter, one of the greatest musicians of The Carpenters, died of Anorexia that the world and myself finally understood how serious food addiction was. As soon as I heard her story, I knew That Was Me!
OBSESSED ABOUT FOOD – MY SECRET
By this time, Glen & I were already set to get married, and even after that, we both worked so much that even he didn’t realize the extent of my addiction. I was “in the closet”. For years, I obsessed about food, and damaged my health by extreme diets, exercise and taking almost any kind of “miracle drug” to lose weight. So why am I telling you all of this? Because I know that by me being truthful about my challenges with food, I may help even one person because they will know that “I Understand”. I understand what it’s like to think about food every second of everyday, to always look forward to the next meal, planning calorie by calorie. To starve yourself so long that one day you just can’t control it anymore, and you binge eat by yourself because you know something’s wrong as you eat massive servings of food without any control. Then you wake up the next morning and your stomach muscles ache (like you did 100 sit-ups the night before), and all you did was binge eat and stretch your stomach muscles so much that they hurt to breathe. Now for those of you who have never had this problem, I could say more, however, I think you get the idea that this is very warped thinking as the physical body is so “out of wack”, that your mind is delusional.
IN DENIAL, EVERYTHING LOOKED NORMAL
So, the years go by and I somehow manage to keep this “secret” hidden, as I do my best to be a normal wife, mother, and have a corporate job, where I was known to always be on a diet and I exercised aerobically at least three times per week. Fortunately, in 1995, I looked for a home based business, and I found Herbalife International. (Please continue reading, as I am not trying to sell or even slightly promote, that’s why posting this was so difficult, as I myself, do not like being sold. I am following my “intuition”, and if you keep on reading, you’ll understand why I had to post this today.) When I found the home based business, I wanted to learn the business. I didn’t believe the products would work on me…remember, I had the “secret” of my addiction, that nobody could understand, much the less help me! However, my sponsor was very good in telling me I must take the products so I could see for myself how I would feel. So, I did, reluctantly, and of course, I never believed the products would actually work (not for me anyway)! I learned the home business, and did very well, however, the most surprising thing happened…I started to lose weight and feel great AND for the first time in my entire life, I wasn’t thinking about food every second of everyday! I still remember the first time I looked at the clock and it was lunch time, and I hadn’t planned it out yet!! 😯 I couldn’t believe it!! Then as the days went by, I realized I stopped obsessing about food! It was a miracle for me (my opinion only)!
FINALLY FREEDOM AND CONTROL
Now, the rest of the story is history because I have been taking Herbalife nutrition for almost 15 years now, and I have not obsessed about food the whole time. Also, because my body finally got the proper nutrition each day, my body was able to heal itself. All I know is I have freedom today and as long as I take my Herbalife products, I really can eat anything I want and I don’t have any weight challenges anymore. (Disclaimer: I am not saying you will have the same results, and I am not promoting to sell) I am speaking from my heart and my soul had to be transparent.
So many people are suffering today from obesity today and I just saw an article posted by Dr Louis Ignarro saying that “the number of people dying of obesity doubles in 10 years“. Then I saw this shocking video by Jamie Oliver who won the TED speech award. Please take the time to watch this very powerful and shocking video:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jIwrV5e6fMY[/youtube]
Thank you for taking the time to watch. I personally agree with Jamie’s suggestions, however, I also understand that these changes will not happen overnight. In the meantime, there is a solution for our children, and for any of you who feel out of control as I was. The foods we eat today do not supply our bodies with the nutrients it needs to stay healthy and to function properly. With superior nutritional supplementation, and education as Jamie points out here, we can start to “listen” to our bodies and respond to what it needs physically, then we will be able to focus more on the important things in life. Life is meant to be enjoyed and to create, not to be obsessed with addictions and irrational thoughts, as I did for so many years.
Thank you for listening and I hope I didn’t offend anyone. It is my truth and it was time for my soul to speak. I am now complete.
🙂